What the heck, God?!

Do you ever pray and think you are 1000% sure you heard God loud and clear tell you to do something with your life? So then you pursue that thing that you think God told you to do, you go into it with your whole heart, put so much time and effort and passion and love and heart into making it happen. And then…..that door closes. So after that you pray some more, and you think God tells you to do something else, so you chase that with your whole heart….and then that door closes too. Then that happens five thousand more times?? Maybe not exactly five thousand, but it definitely feels like it. Well, yea, that’s where I’m at right now. And have been the past seven months. 

So then the question comes up of how on earth are you supposed to trust and follow God when all He seems to do is close doors on you? Well, I’m gonna be super real with you. It sucks. It’s hard. It’s not fun and it’s not easy. Sometimes it makes me question if I actually do trust God because I feel like I’m genuinely listening to him and following where He’s leading me, so why would He keep doing this to me and keep me from the things that my heart is desiring. 

And then I realize that I’m chasing after things that MY heart is desiring, not necessarily what GOD’S heart is desiring. Now don’t get me wrong, I fully believe that God is for us and he truly desires what we desire, but only if they are good things and they will bring us closer to him. He knows what is good for us and He knows what will bring us the most joy and the most fulfillment. But sometimes, we have such bad tunnel vision that we think we know for sure what will make us happy, and we tend to miss so many other things that could be much more fulfilling for us.  

God knows that the deepest desire of my heart is to have a life full of excitement and adventure. And I know that He will provide that for me. But sometimes he has to put me in my place and tell me that it will happen according to His plan, not mine. 

 Right now, I’m at a place in my life without much adventure, and lots of stability, which is a challenge for me. But through it, God is showing me that every single day can be an adventure if you choose for it to be. Sometimes, we have periods of life where it seems like there’s not much happening, but these are the times of the most growth. 

During this time, I’m learning so much about finding peace and joy in places I didn’t think I could. And learning to see the beauty all around even in the monotonous day-to-day life. I’m also learning patience and living for right now, and not tomorrow. 

If you are constantly trying to get to the next big adventure in your life, you’re going to miss the adventure that’s right here in front of you today. Even if that adventure just involves making vanilla lattes for a few hours then grocery shopping and heading home for an early night. You have the power to choose how to see your life. You can be miserable, constantly wishing your life was more exciting, or you can choose to make every day exciting by seeing the beauty that’s right here in front of you. 

Keep trusting God. Keep praying for the things that your heart desires. I know that God has big and amazing plans for each one of our lives, we just need to work on being so in depth with our prayer lives that our plans and desires start lining up with God’s plans and desires for us. He is all knowing and all good and He truly does want what’s best for us. We can’t lose our faith in Him when we’re going through rough periods in our lives. We need to keep our eyes focused on Him and trust that He’s got us. 

If you’re in a similar boat as me and you’re faced with closed door after closed door, maybe take a step back for a minute. See if there are any signs that you’re missing. I know I can be so closed-minded and choose not to look at signs that give me an answer that I really don’t want to hear. But when I take a step back and look at the big picture, I realize that there are good reasons to why there are some doors I’m just not meant to walk through. 

Now, trust me, they’re not all like this, and I honestly do have a hard time accepting some of the things that end up falling through that I genuinely had my heart set on. But, again, that’s where your faith seriously gets put to the test and you realize that all you can do is trust God and know that He’s got you and He’s got better plans for you than you have for yourself. 

He promises us all the desires of our hearts if we just follow Him and give Him our whole hearts. I know one day, it might 50 years from now, but one day, I will look back at this time in my life and I will have clarity on why all of the things I had been counting on just kept falling through. I believe that everything happens for a reason and hopefully this just means there’s an even bigger adventure right around the corner that I wasn’t even expecting! 

Do you enjoy reading about all my travels and adventures? Would you like to help my adventures continue by supporting me financially? If you do, then please know, that would mean the world to me! To do this, you can go to my Patreon page to choose which level you would like to support me at! Thanks for your love and support and remember to make every day an adventure!

Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose hope is the Lord. He is like a tree planted beside the waters that stretches out its roots to the stream. Jeremiah 17: 7-8 

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